The Opposite of Insecurity
If insecurity refers to a profound sense of self-doubt – a deep feeling of uncertainty about our basic worth and our place in the world, then its opposite must be self-confidence and certainty. That is partially true, but what is the source of such confidence and certainty? Can't self-confidence and certainty also become a bad thing? There is such a thing as overconfidence and there are plenty of people who are certain about things that are completely wrong. Overconfidence is seen in the student who doesn't study and gets a passing grade, but not an excellent grade. Overconfidence is found in people who show up at an audition for a singing competition, but cannot actually sing on tune. There is an unhealthy certainty in those who believe in conspiracy theories and those who follow cult leaders. They are certainly wrong. Overconfidence and misled certainty are often linked to pride. The healthy confidence and certainty that God wants for us is always attached to humility. An important verse to understand this concept is found in Proverbs 3:5-8: "Trust in the Lord completely, and do not rely on your own opinions. With all your heart rely on him to guide you, and he will lead you in every decision you make. Become intimate with him in whatever you do, and he will lead you wherever you go. Don't think for a moment that you know it all, for wisdom comes when you adore him with undivided devotion and avoid everything that's wrong. Then you will find the healing refreshment your body and spirit long for." (TPT) The confidence and certainty we need are not found within us, but within him. When we are utterly dependent on him, then we will discover the healing and wholeness we desire. Notice that the verse says "become intimate with him," that is, have a real relationship with God. Not superficial, but deep and devoted. The security we want comes from the relationship we need with the God of the insecure. My own insecurities are tempered by my relationship with Jesus. I feel secure because I know he loves me. I am certain, not about things that matter little, but about God's great purpose and his kingdom's future. That makes me confident and certain, not in my own ability, but in his power. I know He cares for me and has the power to perform what He wants in my life, so why should I feel insecure? The problem is growing in relationship so that I can trust him completely with all of my heart.